Download Drama CD Shingeki no Kyojin
Raging Cleaning Battle
Levi VS Mikasa
English Translate:
In the year of 850, suddenly in the Chousa Heidan[1] headquarter a new battle occur. It happens in one certain day after Eren Yeager entered the corps.
*chime sound*
Levi: *open the door roughly* Wake up, shitty brat! How long will you plan to stay sleep?
Eren: *half asleep* Hanji-san, that kitchen knife…
Levi: Oi!!
Eren: *wake up in surprised* HEICHOU[2]??? Good morning!!
Levi: In such an important day, I’m amazed you could sleep like an idiot. What a nuisance!
Eren: An important day? Is it another experiment with Hanji-san? It’s still dawn though.
Levi: Today we’ll do the headquarter’s 2nd massive cleaning.
Eren: Cleaning? Are we going to clean the headquarter again? It’s true that on the first cleaning the day after yesterday something happened…
Levi: Of course! We clean the headquarter once in two days.
Eren: Once in two days?
Levi: Right. What did you do on the last cleaning?
Eren: I was cleaning the garden.
Levi: Then, today you clean this place.
Eren: YES, SIR!
*Title Call* Alter Story Special Drama CD. Shingeki no Kyojin. Heichou vs Mikasa. A Rage Cleaning Battle.
*another chime sound*
Eren: Hhh… Magnificent. It’s perfect. *surprised* Heichou! I’ve finished cleaning the room!
Levi: *sigh* This is the result of two hours you spent to clean? It’s not good! Do it from the beginning!
Eren: Where do you find it not good? With the broom I’ve swept every corner, and cleaned it all. If you ask me to do it again, where should I clean it?
Levi: Eren!
Eren: YES!!
Levi: This room is like your brain, full of cracks. And then the dust, is really love those cracks. The cracks on the table, the cracks on the drawer, the cracks appear because you open the window, and the cracks in the door’s metal fitting… That one and every cracks, the dust stay hidden. *touch and caress something* Look! This is them.
Eren: *in his heart* So detailed. He seems like Mikasa.
Levi: They are, even though we clean them again and again, they will find a way to slip in. Good grief… it makes me in despair.
Eren: Please don’t wipe it in my clothes.
Levi: Wait! What is this? Molds? You, are you keeping molds in your room’s wall? Are you planning to plant them? Or are they your new best friends? If this wall is the wall[3] outside, even kyojin won’t get near of it.
Eren: These sure are molds. I was sure that it was a wall decoration.
Levi: *shock* Oi, Eren! Don’t joke around! What are you planning?!?! Why in the back of your bed, there are some mushrooms sprouting up?!?!
Eren: M, Mushrooms??? Then I always sleep in the rooms full with molds and mushrooms?? Am, am I look find? Am I look like infected with some sickness…
Levi: *drawing his swords* Don’t come closer!! Now I understand. The problem is not your cleaning skill. The real problem is your brain!!! Your brain is too rotten until you even overlook those large quantities of dusts, thinking of molds as a wall design, you even cultivate mushrooms on the back side of your bed. I will make Hanji to examine you!
*suddenly the door open*
Mikasa: I couldn’t stand to hear it any longer! So pitiful!
Eren: Mikasa!
Mikasa: Eren’s brain is not rotten! Everyone who do cleaning can unintentionally overlook dusts, molds, or mushrooms. And just because of that you judge Eren’s brain to be rotten… you were just want to break Eren’s mental down by asking him to do cleaning and finding those! You are just a humanity’s the most clean freak sadistic man! To such a freak, I won’t give Eren to him easily!!! *Mikasa draws her sword*
Eren: OI!! Stop it Mikasa!! Moreover why are you here??
Armin: Today all the cadets are have a day off.
Eren: Armin, since when?!?!
Armin: Then Mikasa ask me to meet you together.
Mikasa: Don’t worry Eren. I will protect you.
Levi: You’re Eren’s childhood friend from before? I see. But, you’re wrong! Even A grain of dust, a piece of mold, and a mushroom, remove them all! That’s what called as cleaning.
Mikasa: Are you saying that you can do that?
Levi: Do you think I can’t?
Mikasa: Are you challenging me?
Eren: Oi Mikasa!!
Mikasa: Which one of us can make Eren’s room cleaner. Do you want to compete with me?
Levi: *smirk* Interesting. I’ll accept your challenge!
Eren: Seriously??
Armin: A cleaning showdown with the humanity’s strongest, the one to be said for decades as his power alone is the same as a troupe of soldier!!! I,,, I’ll bet for Heichou with my dinner in one year!!!
Eren: What are you saying, Armin!!
Levi: Eren! You become the reporter.
Eren: Huh??? There’s no way I could do that. I am a poor talker. Above that, why is it needed?
Levi: If there’s no reporter, Auruo and Petra will be bored.
Eren: Ehh…?
Armin: It’s fine, Eren. You’re always excited for this kind of thing, right? You can surely do it today too! I can’t do anything except support you.
Levi: And you’ll be the commentator, mushroom head!
Armin: ….
Levi: Oi!
Armin: Yes?
Levi: I’m speaking to you, mushroom head!
Armin: HEEEEEE??? Me???
Levi: Is there another people here? You’ll be the commentator.
Mikasa: Armin, you’re an experienced person. Please help Eren.
Armin: But that’s… impossible! To commenting a cleaning, there’s no way I can do that! *draw his swords*
Eren: Oii!!! Calm down, Armin!!!
Armin: It’s fine. I’ll be settled soon. But, it’s dangerous. I know nothing about cleaning. I am allergic to dust. I always count on other people to do the cleaning. When the reclaimed land time, Eren and Mikasa always did it for me. Even before that, the one who cleaned the house is always my grandfather. I… So far I lived… I never do cleaning even once!! For someone like me, there’s no way I could be a commentator for cleaning!!! And if I can’t be the commentator, I no more than an outcast @#@#$#$
Eren: Oi Armin!!! Where are you going?? That is where the staircase is!!
Armin: *fall in the staircase* AAAAAAAAAARRRGGGHHH…..!!!!!
Eren: What a fall Armin Arlert!! He fall from the staircase!! And his body is rolling down!! Because a mere moment of unpreparedness, he fall to the lower ground like he fall desperately to the hell!!! What lies there actually in the ground of his agony? Ah! I see! So this is a report! No! It’s not a right time for this. Are you okay, Armin? I will bring you right away to Hanji-san’s place!!
Levi: Hey, you! Eren’s childhood friend. I’ll give you 30 minutes. Prepare what you need.
Mikasa: Yes!
Eren: Now, Special Operation Unit Members, sorry to make you all wait. From now on, the humanity’s strongest soldier, Levi Heichou and the first rank of cadets, Mikasa Ackerman will be duel in the foremost cleaning competition!
Armin: Both sides now, will held the fight in Eren Yeager’s new room. Heichou is wearing a mass production mask, cleaning corps style. On the other side Mikasa wear a pink apron with rabbit on it, which she stole from Auruo-san.
Eren: Now, let’s begin! Auruo-san, the beginning signal!!
*Auruo hit the bell*
Eren: Wow Mikasa Ackerman! In a blink she straightly move!
Armin: She is so fast!! With the speed that we can’t even caught with our eyes, she went to the bed!!
Eren: Whoa!!! In the back side of the bed, first she annihilates the mushrooms!! Hurray!! Now I can sleep in peace!!
Armin: It’s not just the mushrooms! She went straight on the bed, and clean all the dirty part with dust clothes!! She collects all the dust effectively! It’s more than a good job! And, she flipped the table!
Eren: Oi!! Make sure to return it to normal!
Armin: It’s not the time for that, Eren!! Look at Heichou!!!
Eren: Amazing!!! What an amazing speed! With those awesome speed he cleaned all the molds on the wall!! There are dirt everywhere, he’s movement is so beautiful like a butterfly who try to break out from its chrysalis. (??? Not sure)
Levi: Are you satisfied with cleaning the bed, Eren’s childhood friend? That’s the result of a newbie’s work!
Mikasa: !! A expected from Humanity’s strongest cleaning soldier!
Armin: No, wait! This is terrible! Even though he can cleaned the lower place perfectly, with this condition the upper part… the wall’s upper part… cannot be reached with Heichou’s stature!!!!
Eren: It will be a bad appearance if he half-heartedly clean the wall rather than not doing it at all! Now, what will you do, humanity’s strongest cleaning soldier? *machinery SFX* IMPOSSIBLE!!! 3DMG[4]?!?!?! Heichou is using his 3DMG!!! Duster(?) in his right hand! And broom in his left hand!
Armin: It’s… impossible!!! That… that is… 3 Dimentional Maneuver Cleaning[5]!!! In this awfully small Eren’s room, he utilized the 3DMC[5] technique!!! Is this… is this what is called as the true ability of a man who known as the major general of humanity’s stongest cleaning soldier???
Eren: The wall, the floor, the ceiling, all of them are clean now! Yeah!!! Now I can sleep without worries!!!
Levi: Do you understand now, Eren’s childhood friend? This is what called as ‘Cleaning’.
Armin: Now, the result of this competition might could be read.
Mikasa: Not yet!!!
*machinery SFX*
Eren: Now Mikasa is using the 3DMC technique too!
Armin: No way!!! 3DMC is a technique to be mastered after many years of experience, but, she can do it after seeing it once?!?!?! What a fearful talented person!!!
Eren: My room is getting cleaner and cleaner! Thank you!!!!!
Armin:No!!! It’s not something to be celebrated of yet, Eren! Look! The walls and the ceiling are full of holes because of their anchors!!
Eren: E?
Armin: WOW!!! The wall on Heichou’s side is collapsed!!!
Levi: Tch! The copperware is defected.
Eren: My room…
Armin: And then, Mikasa also broke down the opposite wall!!!!
Eren: HUH?!?!?! What did you do, Mikasa?!?!?!
Mikasa: Don’t worry, Eren. If the right side of the wall crumbled down, it’s better if we break the left side too. Then, this will look like a normal room. Above all, your room is expanded.
Eren: Ah, you’re right.
Levi: Ho… Not bad. But, if the room expanded, it means more space for us to clean.
Armin: Then with the expansion of cleaning space, Heichou as soon as possible stand with his 3DMG.
Levi: That’s true. Oi, Eren, you want bigger room, right?
Eren: I do, Sir!! A big and clean room with full of sun shining down! *Machinery SFX* But, please wait, Heichou! That can’t be done!! If you anchor the 3DMG there the ceiling will…
Armin: No, there’s no time anymore! Let’s run Eren!!!
Eren: AAAAARRGHH!!!
*Crumbling down ceiling SFX*
Armin: Are you okay, Eren?
Eren: But… my room…
Armin: It’s not just your room! Look! Without any supportive walls anymore, this Chousa Heidan’s heardquarter will… will… right now!!!
*building collapse SFX*
Eren: The headquarter… broke down… Then what will happen? From now on I will always live in the research facility???
Armin: It can’t be helped, Eren. Moreover let’s decide who wins the competition.
Levi: *appear from the ruined*There’s no need anymore.
Eren: Eh?
Mikasa: *appear from the ruined too* Right. There’s no need anymore.
Armin: But, Heichou. What do you mean by there’s no need to decide anymore?
Levi: Up until now, I’ve been cleaning thousand times. I always cleaning the whole my life. You can say that I can’t live without cleaning. But, I never cleaning wholeheartedly like I’ve done today before. It thanks to your childhood friend that I can do it now. Right, Eren’s childhood friend? You can understand it, right? After cleaning wholeheartedly, this refreshing feelings.
Mikasa: Yes. It’s regrettable to say though.
Levi: This refreshing feelings, I don’t want it to be soiled by dualism thing such as victory or defeat. I want to tell you that.
Eren: Heichou, is that… the pride of humanity’s strongest cleaning soldier? Don’t tell me, Heichou, you want me to learn that pride?
Levi: It’s not such a big thing like that.
Eren: Heichou, I apologize. I… I know nothing about cleaning. I just… I just merely like cleaning.
Mikasa: Eren, you don’t need to apologize.
Armin: She’s right. You can star to learn from now on.
Levi: It’s as childhood friend and mushroom-head said. You have plenty time to learn.
Eren: Thank you. Heichou, plese teach me about cleaning from the basic things.
Levi: *smirk* Hey Eren, do you see this mountain of rubble?
Eren: Yes!
Levi: Let’s start cleaning from here!
Eren: He?
*chime sound*
Eren: That’s impossible… Heichou…
Levi: Oi, wake up, shitty brat!
Eren: He, Heichou?!?!?! Good morning!!!
Levi: Grumble in sleep… Disgusting!!
Eren: I… I feel like have been seeing a very long dream. But I don’t clearly remember it.
Levi: I don’t care about that. Let’s start right away.
Eren: What’s about starting?
Levi: Today, is a big cleaning day!
*Song started*
*Title end call* Alter Story Special Drama CD. Shingeki no Kyojin. Heichou vs Mikasa. A Rage Cleaning Battle.
Cast:
Eren Yeager: Kaji Yuki
Levi: Kamiya Hiroshi
Armin: Inoue Marina
Mikasa: Ishikawa Yui
The end
Translator Note:
[1] Chousa Heidan: Recon Corps/Survey Corps/Scouting Legion. I will write is as Chousa Heidan.
[2] Heichou: Levis’s rank in Chousa Heidan. Again, I’ll write it as Heichou.
[3] Wall Maria, Rose, and Sina.
[4] 3DMG: ?????? (Rittai Kidou Souchi) 3 Dimensional Maneuver Gear.
[5] 3DMC: 3 Dimensional Maneuver Cleaning. Is a pun of 3DMG. The Japanese word is?????? (Rittai Kidou Souji). Instead of Souchi (Gear), Armin change it into Souji (Cleaning)
Source: Gomen aku lupa dapet translate ini darimana, yang pasti dari tumblr dan makasih banyak!!
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